mixed faith marriages

Mixed Faith Marriage: Who’s In Charge?

"Sometimes back then it felt like we were patching the airplane we were flying with parts that were already on fire.  And there have been many “you have got to be kidding me” points when we compared the dumpster fire in front of us with the pristine instructions on that theoretical instruction page that is the church handbook."

Differentiation as a Practice and Tool (Mixed-faith Marriage Series)

"We can have different beliefs from one another while still being connected."

Patriarchy in a Mixed Faith Marriage 

"A mixed faith marriage has an impact on both the husband and wife. Those impacts may not be identical. Looking at the differences men and women face can shine a light on areas that cause pain and frustration but can be hard to articulate."

Saying Grace

"The first few months going to church with our 5 children was hard for me emotionally. I was on the verge of tears most weeks. I felt alone. No one asked about my husband’s absence because they assumed he was traveling for work. I let them think that. I couldn’t handle reality without crying."

What an Unplanned Pregnancy Taught Me About My Mixed-Faith Marriage

"All my life, I have cared deeply about being a good person. And until I accepted my mixed faith marriage for what it was, I had used the church to determine my definition of “good.” But Adam’s somewhat offhand confession of doubt turned into many more conversations, and it became obvious which direction his beliefs were turning. He eventually left the church altogether, and we had to decide: are we committed to each other, or to a version of us that exists only in our heads?"

Developing Respect and Communication in Mixed-Faith Relationships

"As a newly married 30-year-old Mormon woman, I didn’t expect to be sitting on a pew alone each Sunday. However, that is exactly where I found myself in Omaha, Nebraska each week...each Sunday we separated, me going to the LDS chapel and him heading to work. This was the first taste I got of what it might be like to be in a mixed-faith relationship. The way people at church would look at me, the bishop calling me into his office to ask where my partner was and why he wasn’t attending, and feeling isolated and lonely when I attended church."

Why Mixed-Faith Marriages Fail and What the Church Could Do to Help.

"Sarah (name changed) sat across from me, shifting on the therapy couch. “I’m just so lonely,” she said through tears. “We used to be able to talk about everything. I used to be able to come home from a long day and kind of melt into him, into the relationship we have together. Now it’s just tension. Even in our best moments, there’s an unspoken divide between us. The distance just grows and grows no matter how hard we try to find our way through it. It all feels so impossible.”

To share or Not to Share, That is The Question…Or Is It? Navigating sharing your thoughts and feeling in your mixed-faith relationship

"One common theme that has repeatedly come up in my own mixed-faith marriage, as well as most of the couples that I work with, is about sharing authentic thoughts, feelings, and experiences related to religion/faith in a mixed-faith situation. Often people wonder whether they can really share their true joys or their pains related to their faith experience. They wonder if they can talk about things that are really on their mind, and they wonder what is appropriate or inappropriate to share with their kids in this mixed-faith experience."
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